Wednesday, July 13, 2005

An apology to the owner of the racoon with long toenails

I'd like to apologize to the person who stumbled upon my website by doing a Google search for "clipping racoon toenails." I wish I had some info here that would help you, but instead, you merely found my flippant remark about trimming my baby's fingernails. You turned to Google, and then turned to me, for help, and yet there you are, still taking it one day at a time with your long-toenailed racoon, who is probably even now clawing your patio furniture or one of your neighbor's children. I wish I could be there for you in the way that you had hoped I would. But I promise you this: If some good, solid information about racoon manicures ever does fall in my lap, I will post it here on this blog, without a moment's hesitation. In the meantime, stay strong. Wear several layers of clothing. Don't make any sudden moves. Stay away from the trash cans late at night. And stay tuned to this blog for further information.

15 comments:

Carolyn said...

Once again, you have me laughing out loud!

And, while I've never had Jim Beam and Dr. Pepper, I used to drink Bacardi and Dr. Pepper and it was one damn good drink!

Meh said...

omg, how HOT are you! love the pic.

Masked Mom said...

Ah, the accidental Google visitor...yours was way better than mine, though. I've only attracted people looking for "Jill Taylor Meteorologist" and "Jo Dee Messinna's Birthday." I'm far more concerned about the people trying to give a manicure to a racoon...

Masked Mom said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Mar said...

Karla! You slay me! I have been waiting for interesting google hits to no avail. Perhaps I need to put salacious key words into my posts. Who know racoons and nail clipping would bring out the crazies.


Thanks for the info on adding links to my site! I did it!!!!

Christi said...

How sweet of you to offer to make such information available. From what I understand, that's a pretty well-kept secret.

leesepea said...

LOL!

Janet said...

Who needs to clip racoon toenails? That is so bizarre.

undercover celebrity said...

Ok, I may be a blogging reject for saying this, but how do you know that someone came to your site in search of racoon toenail clipping info?
That kind of information could really spice up my life.

By the way, I LOVE your handy tips on surviving the long-nailed racoon. Hilarious!

leesepea said...

I've always wondered that myself.

Don't worry, we can be blogging rejects together.

And maybe Karla will answer our question!

:)

karla said...

I went to Undercover Celebrity's site and answered this in her comments section, but I'll do it here too. I use Statcounter. You must do this, it's so fascinating. Go to www.statcounter.com and sign up for a free account. It tells you all kinds of stuff about your site, such as what state or country your visitors come from, how many unique (first time) visitors you have, how many repeat visitors you have, which of your web pages is the most popular on your site, etc. One of the handiest things is that it tells you the links people follow to find your page--which is how I discovered about 7 people who had added a link to my site on their own site, without me even knowing...good info to have, because then I returned the favor and linked to THEIR sites on mine. (Including you!) It also tells you what operating systems your vistitors use, what web browsers they use, and more--including, of course, what web searches they may have used to stumble across your site. That one is the most fun, but took awhile for me to see results on, because I didn't have enough content, or unique phrases maybe, on my site at first for anyone to find me that way.

And the only reason I know about this is my husband's a computer geek/genius. I didn't even know what a blog was til he told me.

leesepea said...

Thanks!

That kicks ass!

BMF said...

haha, yea i'm sure it was brian who found statcounter, and yes it is pretty nice. my funniest google searches that came to my site were: Naked Spring Break (and no I dont have naked spring break pictures), BMF Trucks, Smack Magazine BMF, and BMF Entertainment. They must be real things or I dunno why people are searching for them.

BMF said...

ohhh, i forgot one: rhino pooping. who and why is someone searching for that?? and what are they expecting!?

Lyvvie said...

*laughing quietly to myself so not o wake the children*

weird people we share this planet with.