In case you missed Part 1 of this series, a short recap:
Half the folks in Blogland have a 100 Things list, in which they detail 100 miscellaneous facts about themselves, usually along the lines of "I love to cook," and "I'm a Scorpio." I looked deep inside me, and found there's just not much there. What is there is bad. Therefore, I give you my list of 100 Things Wrong With Me. To cut down on the odds that you'll fall asleep reading it, I've broken it up into parts. Here's #11-20.
Part 2 (11 through 20)
11. I'm obsessive about my weight. I weigh myself every day, and if I go one pound over what I was yesterday, I adjust my food and/or workout to get rid of that pound. This is very shallow, empty-headed behavior.
12. I am intolerant of music I don't like. I like a lot of different things, from Rob Zombie or The Chemical Brothers to Billy Joel or Eric Clapton--but the list of music I don't like is far, far greater--and I simply can't tolerate the stuff I don't like. I moan and whine like I'm being forced to watch execution videos. I really have no room to talk, either, because I listen to Gwar, which not one other living person seems to like except me.
13. I refuse to mingle with household garbage in any way. That's the sole reason I got married. The deal at our house is I do all the inside cleaning and Brian does the outside stuff (lawn, mostly) and takes out the trash. Once in a while, he takes out the trash and forgets to put a new trash bag in the can, and then he leaves for work. I will actually leave trash sitting on the floor next to the can all day rather than just putting a new bag in there myself--that's "boy work." When he gets home from work, there's a tidy little pile of refuse waiting for him.
14. I often speak before I think, which can lead to embarrassing exchanges that haunt me for years. Fortunately for me, I speak at a very fast pace, so my only hope when I've said something so retarded that chills run down my spine the moment the words leave my lips is that maybe, just maybe, they didn't catch it or are unsure they heard it right. They probably spend the next hour or so running it over in their minds asking themselves, "Did she say what I think she said? No, it's not possible. No intelligent person would say anything so stupid." Little do they know.
15. I have no ambition or competitive spirit whatsoever. If I'm playing a game with someone, I don't really care if I win, and I've never been one of those people who really sets career goals for myself. I don't know if I could handle success, but I've totally mastered mediocrity.
16. I have a major fear of my house burning down. We have a fireplace that I basically won't let my husband make use of. My big fear is of the house burning down and taking all my photos with it. The lengths I've gone to to avoid this are comical--I have scanned each and every photo we own--literally thousands--and saved them to CD, making two copies. One copy stays at the house, just so I have the digital images to screw around with, and one copy goes into a fireproof safe at my father-in-law's office. All my negatives are in that safe, too. Then of course, there's my secondary fear: That someone will break into my father-in-law's office and steal the safe. The sad part about this is that if you could take a look at these photos I cherish so dearly, you'd just see a lot of drunk people with retarded looks on their faces, and you'd wonder what I'm getting so sentimental about.
17. I sleep with a big brown teddy bear. Yes, like a three-year-old might. His name is Roe.
18. I change my clothes in the car a lot. Usually while driving, but more often at stop lights. I can't stand to be too hot or too cold, so I usually have a change of clothes and shoes with me, and I change in the car rather than hauling everything into a bathroom to do it properly. I'm like Superman, only without the phone booth. And without all that do-gooder baggage.
19. I love leaving drawers and cabinet drawers open. This is not to say that I am too lazy to shut them, but that I love leaving them open. It just seems sensible to me--if I'm going to need another bowl later today, why not just leave the cabinet open so it'll be easier to get to? And no, I wouldn't want the cabinet doors removed instead, because then things would look cluttered, and I like things to look neat; hence the beauty of closing the cabinets on those stacks of dishes when company comes over. But when it's just us at home, why not leave them open? Well, according to Brian, it's because he keeps whacking his fragile skull on the open cabinet doors. I never do this myself because I expect them to be open. He expects them to be closed, so he continually slices his head open on the doors, then gripes and pleads for me to close them from now on. I nod solemnly and tell him I'm sorry. Then I continue to leave them open.
20. I had my husband's wedding band inscribed with this heartfelt phrase: "Put it back on." I proudly gave it to him and expected a big laugh when he read it. Instead, he was visibly disappointed with the lack of romance. I had to keep saying, "But isn't it funny? Come on, that's funny!" He didn't think a wedding band was the right place to crack a joke.
But come on, it's funny, right?